and baby makes... two?

I did not go to college to become a single mom- or so I've come to joke. In fact, I had always tried to avoid the whole having-a-baby out of wedlock stereotype. It's bad enough I am a divorcee, but a single mom in the South is not something to brag about. To make matters even worse, my baby-daddy is a junkie. And that is not even the half of it- oh, yes dear readers, the plot thickens.

My baby's father is actually the former best friend of my ex-husband (are you still with me?). I shall refer to him from here on out as either The Relative or the Biological Fool, or simply the Fool, as 'biological father' denotes some level of intimacy that this man does not have with my child.

The Fool was in fact a groomsmen at my first wedding, and a longtime friend of my ex. Gradually, the Fool conned his way into my family, winning us over with his quick wit and charm. From the moment of my divorce, he was determined to weasel into my romantic graces. Out of what little respect I still held for my ex, I always deferred the Fool's advances. Based on what I knew of his sordid history, I also did not trust him. But I digress...

Once my ex-husband began dating my roommate, I was hurt and outraged. After they had been together more than a year (I even heard a rumor she moved in with him), the Fool advanced again and I thought, hell, turnabout is fair play. I am still waiting for a phone call from one of Jerry Springer's staff, although I am not sure who would attack who on camera. Given the opportunity, it would be a toss-up between my whorish former roommate or the lousy excuse of a man who shares my son's DNA.

I have to admit, it took some convincing, several beers and a love letter, when I finally said "maybe." Thus began a tentative romance with a man I knew to be dishonest, spoiled and egotistical to boot. Yet people change, right?

Looking back, my youthful optimism alludes me...in my defense, I worked sixty hours a week, lived alone with my cat and was, quite honestly, lonely. Okay, so I had not been laid in several months either but I swear that had nothing to do with it! I was tired of dating, sick of being alone and ready to have someone to share my life with, again. The possibility of exploring these emotions with someone who was already considered 'part of the family' was also tantalizing, and it felt safer, more secure than the average 'dates' I had for the past six months or so (ironically, all of these men were incredibly nice and respectable).

My surprise pregnancy can be blamed on one of two things: Rock Rabbit Savignon Blanc, Blue Moon and karaoke, or Man's Dislike of Condoms. My memory is fuzzy on this one... but my son's conception was in fact my greatest mistake- because I love him dearly and Aiden has enriched my life in ways that only a mother can comprehend.

Alas, my child awaits. Naps only last so long, yet they are a mother's blessing. To be continued...